Six Months Old

That's right! I'm an entire half year old!

Where does the time go, anyway? One minute you're being yanked out into a cold room by your bare backside and the next minute you're rolling around another cold room...on your bare backside.

I can roll now. I don't do it often. Just enough to make my mommy heave alternate sighs of relief and concern. I mostly like rolling around when I'm nudie pants because I love the feel of olefin pile carpeting all over every square inch of my adorable chubby body.

Now, don't go getting all concerned that I'm going to grow up to be a performance artist or some questionable character who likes to wander around flooring stores rubbing his elbows on the Persian rugs. Because, to tell the truth, I'd rather be sitting up. Oh, sitting up! I don't how many of you can sit up, but let me tell you, there's nothing like it. Most of all because you can see things not all upside-down backwards or sidewise, and that makes a difference when you're reading Goodnight Moon or watching Baby Galileo with your sister and forming your first impressions of planet rotation around the sun or hand puppets. Upside-down hand puppets are scary and make me scream.

Although, I don't sceam often. I am what Mommy calls "a mellow baby." When mommy bundles me up in the Land's End fleece straight jacket and we go wheeling around the gorcery store, people stop and say things like, "Oh, what a cute baby! Is he a good baby?" And Mommy always says, "Oh, he has his moments when he steals the car keys and drives to bars, but mostly he's a mellow baby." And I smile and gurgle and put on a little show to make that person's day, and do a pretty good job of saving all my "moments" for between the hours of 6:00 PM and 10:00 PM.

Usually, around 6:00 PM, I begin what I like to call My Joe Cocker Impersonation. That's where I enter the spotlight with a little melodic blues singing and hand flapping, but then over the course of the song I start busting out with the gutteral wailing, hair pulling, and full body shakes. All, of course, to a smokin' horn section.

What else, what else....

Well, I still think my sisters are a hoot. They can both get me belly-laughing just by waving their arms around and making goofy sounds.

And one of my favorite activities of all time is chewing on things. Paper, toothbrushes, stuffed animals, more paper. Chewing just feels so good. Once in a while I play this game where I chew on my toothbrush, and then I put it in Mommy's mouth so she can chew on it. My little-big sister says, "That's gross." I call it "building my immune system". Whatever an immune system is.

Okay. It's time for nappies now. I'll be back at seven months with more tales from the floor.

And don't forget - it's never to early to start shopping for someone's first birthday! I'm thinking chewy toys, I'm thinking more socks, I'm thinking a white suit and a t-shirt just like Joe Cocker's that says "Stuff". I'll take on John Belushi's impersonation any day.